Follow the Little Green Dragon
by LittleMissGothicChyld
Summary: This is a cross over with The Matrix and BtVS. More of a comedy with Spike. NOT COMPLETED and never will be due to lack of interest shown in the story
1. The text message

Disclamier: Joss W as per usually and also the makers of The Matrix  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Summary: Spike is just a normal every day thug, but what would happen if he followed the dragon into it's home?  
  
Authors Notes: I'm sick of hearing about the Matrix so I'm changing the characters around to fit my own little personal pleasure. Anyone hate it tough! Don't read it, simple as that. Now, my mood is very evil so... this is going along with my mood of the day. Enjoy.  
  
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Walking around the streets in his usual attire, black leather duster, neatly pressed black pants, a silk black top with his favourite black combat boots which had a few scrapes on it... as well as the leather duster. Nothing was going the way he planned. The landlord wanted money off him to pay for the rent, on which he was really over-due with. It's reply to that was to turn his room up side down and get out of there.  
  
Next he went down the pub to drown his sorrow with Jack Daniels, only to find someone had taken the glass out of his hand and threw it over him. His reply to that? Punished the fellow in the nose until it broke then drank down what ever was left in the glass... then smashed it over the persons head.  
  
Then that stupid bar-maid called the cops which didn't help matters. Trying to take him under arrest, silly people. All he done was...  
  
A bleep went off in his pocket, which stopped his trail of thought. His left hand moved down to his pocket and pulled out his top of the range... stolen from a few weeks ago... mobile phone. Pressing a few buttons he found a text message with the strangest number he'd every seen. Wanting to delete it, since he thought it would be another offer from another company, he resisted the urge and glanced at it.  
  
'Hello William. Don't be alarmed. Just follow the little green dragon.' It said. Spike glanced around slightly, wondering if it was some kind of joke. But no one was around. Bleep. He glanced down at the mobile again which read 'And your hair is becoming frizzy.'  
  
Automatically a hand moved up to his hair on which he ran through it. And it was starting to become a tad frizzy at the back. He spun around a few time, looking if he could see anyone. Not a single soul. Mobile still out in his hand he took a few cautious steps down the street.  
  
When he came to the end of the street he looked either way, then back up the street he came from only to turn to his right and continue down a different street. His hands fidgeted with the mobile phone whilst he walked. A small glance up then back down to the mobile. He stopped suddenly.  
  
He slowly raised his head back down the street and saw it, a sign with a flashing neon green dragon on it. He returned the mobile back into it's rightful place as he quickened his speed to get to this sign. Once in front of the sign he saw it was a Chinese shop, a small one at that. He glanced up and down the street and moved to a window of the shop.  
  
He looked inside, through the window only find it to be a normal everyday Chinese shop. A small glance up to the dragon he noted one of it's claws were pointing to the shops door. "What else can go wrong?" he thought out aloud as he moved to the door of the shop with a wicked glimmer in his eyes and on his lips.  
  
A/N - Can you tell this is going to be some kind of a comedy? I would like reviews please, but no flames. There will be more to this but only if I feel like it's actually worth doing more of you people. This is basically only a taster, and the chapters will get longer. I just want to know your reaction... please? 


	2. The mighty wok

Authors Notes: Tsk, no one likes this?! Fine! But I'm continuing this anyways since I'm bored with nothing to do at 1 in the morning. So there! Blows a raspberry  
  
Summary: So... Spike has followed the 'little green dragon' and what shall happen in this Chinese shop? An order taking place? A strange man chatting him up? A quest? Everything? Find out by... well... reading it.

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The smell hit him first as he opened the door. Fried rice, the sauces, prawn toast being... toasted. If he was still a mortal, his mouth would be watering by now. The second thing that hit him was a metal wok over the back of his head which knocked him out cold.  
  
Opening one eye as the next eye followed suit. He could tell he was sitting down in the back room of the Chinese shop where they kept all the ingredients in wrapped in foil. In front of him, he could see a storage freezer where it was used, by the looks of the white frilly dolly on it, as a table.  
  
"Welcome to my evil lair Mr William... damn I gotta get that phrase changed soon"  
  
"It's Spike... and you are?"  
  
The man sitting at the opposite side of the 'table', wearing a pink silk shirt with neon green tight leather pants. Blue hair, which was spiked up gave him a Japanese slashy look... well... he was Japanese after all and slashy? ... well... you'll just have to see won't you? The tops of his finger tips of each hand touched together as he leaned forward in his sun deck chair, "I'm Yonson and I'm here to save the world..."  
  
"If that is the case then you'll need the poofster and the little blonde dog of his. Not me." Spike said as he stood up, but unable to due to his wrists were locked down to the arm of the metal chair.  
  
Using his vampyric strength to try and pull free, but with no use. Yonson stood up at this point and moved towards Spike, standing behind the chair, "No. You know what he done? Do you?! He tried to touch me up! I mean come on! I maybe pretty but I'm not gay!"  
  
Spike lips started to twitch slightly with amusement at the thought of it all. Well, he always thought Angel was a poofster. The amusement faded from his face as Yonsons' hand touched his own. "I'm actually bi-sexual..."  
  
Spike frown and glared at Yonson as he flexed his fingers, ready to use his strength again to try and break free and snap this persons neck off like a twig, but Yonson moved his hand and went back to the chair he was just occupying and stood behind that one instead.  
  
"I need your help Will... Spike. You see, I've been asked to deliver a certain delivery to a place. The man who ordered the food sounded perfectly normal but who would order special fried rice, prawn sauce, monkey poulet AND prawn crackers...?!"  
  
Spike just stared at this person in disbelief as Yonson just started laughing. A second later his cute little boy features turned darker as he spoke now in a very serious tone. "Mr Spike, the real reason I asked you to come here is because the health and safety people want to shut down good take-away shops in this area so they can set up bases to... to... control peoples mind with their own food. You have to stop them!"  
  
Whilst he was mumbling on, Spike glanced around the room, wondering if he was dreaming or not still. Spike noticed the silence in the room and turned his blonde head towards Yonson. "And what's in it for me?!"  
  
"Well, erm, knowing you've done good isn't for you... so... I guess it'll have to be that you'll get plenty of 'food' you want and you'll get to beat up loads of people. Maybe piss a few off and also get a take-away..."  
  
Spike raised a blonde eyebrow at him as he tried to raise his hands again to capture the throat of his person and ask if he was trying to play him for a fool, but realised his hands were still locked down. "Listen mate, I like the idea of terror and carnage, but why the take-away when you know I don't eat your kind of... 'food'?"  
  
"Well, it's because I wasn't joking when I wanted you to take a delivery..."  
  
Yonson moved through the door leading out of the storage/back room and into the kitchen area. At this point Spike pulled with all his might to break free from his small prison but failed with flying colours.  
  
Footsteps drew his attention towards the door where Yonson walked back in with a white bag with the food in for delivering and that same wok, which now had a quite large dint in it, in the other hand.  
  
"Sorry about this but..." And that was the last thing he heard before the darkness consumed him... again.  
  
A/N: Stacey, Emma... Yonson was made just for yous hehe. But people... REVIEW PLEASE! I wanna know if this is good or not dammit! 


	3. The Mini Yonson Special Edition

**Disclaimer:** Me really...

**Authors Notes:** This is just for two certain friends who i've been told has started up a mini thread on a forum about Yonson. Well... here you go.

**A Mini Yonson Special**

Standing behind the fryer in this Chinese shop, cleaning it out after a night of working, he wore a bright yellow netted top with nothing underneath it and fake snake-skin tight pants. Top of these was an apron, keeping his clothes clean.

The apron was pink coloured with the words "Kiss the cooks cute ass". His hands were covered with pink gloves which had feathery bits sticking out of the top slightly.

Walking barefooted across the lino flooring to the background, where he had placed the now dinted wok, from a few hours ago, down. He picked it up and tried to look through it's dulled reflection, trying to see if his now spiked up green hair was still in tacked from the cleaning.

With no luck, he wandered over to a shelf which contained a rather large white box, which could store a computer in. Upon opening the lid of the box, inside were lots of shiny things such as daggers, swords, guns and gadgets of all sorts.

Placing the wok inside, Yonsons' features turned boyish as he whispered to himself "Not only a pretty face" before closing the lid.

A FEW MOMENTS LATER...

Ringing was heard in the background. Yonson, who had disposed of the apron and gloves, ran over to the phone and pick it up. "Hell, Yonsons palace. Only the best of pleasures for you. How may I help?"

The person on the other end of the phone hesitated slightly before answering back "This... erm, is the Chinese shop... right?"

"Yes it is. The best pleasures for your taste buds." Yonsons faced beamed at the reply he got. Always the same reply. Always enjoying the reactions.

"In that case... may I interest you in a few items which are on special price Sir?" The males voice said.

A call centre. Great. Yonsons face fell into a rather cute frown. Tapping his foot on the floor as his finally smiled. "I have a different offer in mind... How about... (CENSORED DUE TO WONT ACCEPT IT...). So what do you think Hunny?"

Yonson listened to the person choke on the other end of the phone before finally dragging out "Sorry, much have wrong number, bye." Rather too quickly. Then hung up.

Placing the phone down with a mini twirl so he was now facing the door of the shop. He walked over to the door with a skip in his step. Putting the lock firmly in place and then turning the 'OPEN' sign to 'CLOSED'.

Before turning off the lights to the shop front, he glanced out of the window to the empty street which was slowly filling with light due to the sun rise, he whispered. "Not only a pretty face."

A/N - Yep... the mini Yonson Special... enjoyed?


End file.
